You know what I also suck at? Life. No, seriously, I have lived in a bubble for the past 22 years of my life. I went to a high school in a small town, and I graduated from a college that is smaller than most high schools. Going out into the big bad world has been a huge shock for me, and so I decided to make a list of the top 10 things I didn't learn in college (and am now learning through trial and error in the real world)
- What you learn in college is useless
Well, okay. Maybe not completely useless. And if you're a petroleum engineering major, or athletic training major, then yeah, you might use that information you've had crammed into your skull since the day you walked onto campus. But for the other majors? Not really. That speech you analyzed, that battle in Europe in the 1600s you can't get out of your head, or even the psychological condition you've convinced yourself that you have, they don't matter. What matters are the skills you've applied to create the projects you were assigned. So tuck away the steps of photosynthesis you know by heart, and save it for trivia nights at the local bar you frequent. The steps you took to memorizing those facts? Keep those methods you've learned in the forefront of your brain as you go on with your new job and have to memorize numerous processes in order to pass whatever qualification exam you have to take in order to work. - Networking. It counts
Raise your hand if you had a networking course in college. What, no one? Odd. Yeah, your college's career center may have offered the occasional networking dinner, but how many people actually went to these and knew exactly what to do? First off, I went to one networking event and it was issued through the NCAA during the stint that I thought I wanted to coach college basketball (didn't last long). I had NO CLUE what I was doing. I just sat there and tried not to be awkward, which, if you know me, is near impossible to do. Now that I'm in the real world, it feels like networking is all I do. I have a pile of business cards in my purse or wristlet at all times which has my link to my twitter account my business's website, so if I meet someone who I think even has the slightest possibility of mentioning my company to the right person, I can hand them my contact info. The biggest tip I can give when it comes to networking? Find a common ground. The business I am in has mostly older people in it. I have practically NOTHING in common with them (Or so I think). I will usually start off with saying that I played basketball in college, that I like health and wellness, and that I also enjoy reading. Usually, one of those points strike a chord and we hit it off great. When it doesn't... I usually make something up that I at least know a little bit about. Oops. - You are selling yourself
And I don't mean prostitution. When you are applying for jobs, apartments, trying to find a significant other, you are essentially selling yourself. Your skills, your personality, all of the best qualities you are trying to pass off as the best possible option for that person you are appealing to. It feels fake, and let's be honest, it is. You can't tell someone who is looking to hire you that you suck at figuring out the proper juxtaposition of an image on a page, or even that you don't know what the word juxtaposition means. You can't tell someone on a first date about your severe trust issues, if you do, they will RUN. By upselling your best qualities and downplaying your worst, you are setting yourself up to either be a huge success or disappointment. So pick and choose wisely, young Padawan. - You will be broke
And when I say broke, I mean so broke that duct tape and super glue can't fix your financial situation. Now I know you're thinking, "Kyle was a communication studies major, of course she's broke". NO. The majority of people you went to college with are struggling financially right now unless they got lucky. You may think that everyone is doing great and making so much more money than you are, but most of them aren't, and the ones who actually have money are probably still living at home. I personally chose to move out, for my mothers' sanity and my own, when I got my office job. And my office job doesn't pay that well, so I picked up a job serving a couple nights a week so I could actually have some spending money. I hate being broke and I hate feeling like I'm living paycheck to paycheck, but in terms of situations, I'm doing all right. I can afford groceries, (sometimes I have to budget like no other and clip a ton of coupons, but I eat and I eat a TON) I have a nice car (even if it is a Ford), I live in a nice area. Can I go out drinking every weekend? No, not really. And I still haven't - You will be lonely
Even though I am from central Ohio, I do not know a whole lot of people in Columbus. and if I do, I'm not close with them. My best friend recently got married and moved to Raleigh, another lives 3 hours away, and a couple other very close friends just don't live in the area at all. I hate to admit this, but since graduating I have fallen out of touch with a lot of my friends. It is a lack of effort on both sides. I try to keep in touch through texting and meeting up with them every once in awhile, but the more we move away from our college years, the more I realize that while they were some of my closest friends when I was there, my interests and priorities are changing, as are theirs, and they are becoming strangers to me. My attempts to keep in contact have faltered as the lack of enthusiasm in their responses turn me off to talking to them again. It is HARD making new friends once you're in the real world. Your best friend doesn't live down the hallway anymore, and you can't go grab lunch in your dining hall like you used to do on a daily basis. I have a pretty hectic and busy schedule and I work 3 nights a week, and work during the day on weekdays. If I'm not at work, I'm at the gym, and no one really talks to me there, and I don't talk to anyone there either. Try joining your local Young Professionals Group as a way to branch out. I am joining local basketball and volleyball leagues hoping to meet people who have similar interests to me. But like I said, making new friends is hard once your out of college, and you are going to be lonely at times. - You're on your own
When I moved out on my own, I truly became independent. I had to learn how to budget, I had to learn how to pay bills on time, I've had to learn how to manage my time better. Luckily, being a student athlete pretty much prepared me for 90% of the time management skills you have to learn. If you didn't play a sport in college and weren't involved in multiple organizations, I feel bad for you, son. I've got 99 problems but time ain't one... okay off topic. Mommy and Daddy aren't there to hold your hand anymore. There's no sympathetic professor willing to "let things slide". You screw up? Your fault. Fix it, or fall. - No one will cook for you
My college set up its students to fail. No, seriously. When it comes to cooking, I can guarantee that at least 70% of the population at my alma mater have no idea at what temperature pork should be cooked at, or the difference between baking soda and baking powder (I still don't). Going to a residential college where everyone lives on campus, and everyone has a meal plan, and everyone eats at the dining hall or the cafe means that when you live on your own, you will probably be doing a lot of trial and error when it comes to cooking. My advice? Don't eat chicken when it's pink, butter is a carb, and Pop Tarts are not a sustainable food source. I eat a lot of chicken, oatmeal, sweet potatoes, fruits and veggies- a lot of food that is simple and easy to prepare. My marinade for chicken? Italian dressing. Oatmeal? Microwave, duh. I have expanded my cooking abilities lately, but I do that typically on Saturdays and with the guidance of similar recipes that I find on Instagram or the internet. Food prep is typically the route I choose when it comes to my meals- a massive amount of food prepared at the beginning of the week, put it in tuppeware containers, and heat it up or eat it cold. With my busy schedule, this is the best option for me, so I can continue to eat healthy and meet my macronutrient goals for the day. PS- Don't forget to take your multivitamin! - You have to work with other people
I HATED working in groups in my college classes. If I had to choose working in a group and doing a small portion of the work versus working by myself and doing it all, I would choose going solo, every single time, because I could manage every aspect to the project and do it on my own time. But guess what? That doesn't happen in the real world. No matter what you are going to be stuck working with people and working for people you don't necessarily get along with, or even like. Suck it up, get the work done, and then complain about it after work during Happy Hour and make yourself feel better (if you don't drink like me, go to your gym and go Chris Brown on a punching bag - it makes me feel better. The majority of the people you come across in life are not going to be your bestie. Get over it. #toughlove - Dating sucks
I spent the last semester and graduated college while I was dating someone, but it ended during the summer. Had a great time, good guy, whatever. Dating in college versus dating in the real world? It's unreal. The dates I have gone on since then have been ridiculous. The stories I could share would probably have you rolling on the ground crying. Online dating? Not my thing - come one, we've all tried it. Never actually gone on a date with anyone from said online dating website, the conversations on there were odd enough to turn me off to that pretty quickly. Tinder? Hilarious, but not something to build a strong foundation on. Had a couple dates from friends setting me up, and a few from the gym that I attend and they were all disasters. What's been interesting though is the type of men I seem to attract. I'm not sure if I'm just weird myself or just a freak magnet, but I've heard everything from "Let me see a picture of your foot, what size do you wear?" to "Guess what size my...." (I'll let you figure out how that one ends). Dating in the real world is intimidating. These are guys you don't know anything about. In college, everyone knew everyone so if you asked the right people, you could know exactly who this person has dated, who they have hooked up with, hell you could probably figure out their social security number if you asked around enough. Yeah. That small of a school. I'm still trying to figure out the dating game. Maybe it'll get better... but for now I'm just playing everything by ear and taking it with a grain of salt. Jaded? Maybe. But you run across enough deadbeats and foot fetishes, you would be too. - There is no map to plan your life on.
As much as it sucks, it's true. You don't know what you will be doing 10 years from now, you might not even know where you'll be living! Everyone goes to college with a set plan, "I'm going to major in XXXXX and graduate with a XXX and get a job with XXXXXXX. That almost never happens. I went to college thinking I wanted to be a doctor! And then I took chemistry, and intro to cellular biology, and calculus, well, let's just say that I am not particularly gifted in math and I lacked the work ethic early in my college career to keep up with the rigorous coursework. So I switched from biology to health science to psychology to communication studies, and finished as a comm major in 4 years (to the amazement and relief of my father) with a pretty decent GPA (If I do say so myself). My career choices ranged from doctor to basketball coach to "I have no clue leave me alone let me eat this giant piece of cake". And while I do have a job now, I can guarantee you that it won't be where I stay for the rest of my life. I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do, and I probably won't figure that out for a couple years. And that's okay. I will probably end up at grad school someday- I do know that I want my Masters Degree, still deciding on what though, but other than that, I don't know what I want to do. My dad didn't figure out what he wanted to do and got his PhD at the age of 40. But today, he loves what he does. He goes into work every day looking forward to babysitting a hundred screaming hellions (He's an elementary school gym teacher)